Today marks Banc Media’s sixth birthday, and to celebrate we’re going to indulge in a little schadenfreude and look at six of history’s monarchs, rock bands, TV shows and influential individuals who couldn’t quite make it to six years. It may seem cruel to revel in the misfortune of others but it’s our birthday and we can do what we want!
Making their name less than a mile from Banc Media’s first home, at Salford Lads Club, The Smiths can boast accolades, awards and lasting influence but cannot match our longevity (or selection of communal fizzy pops). Managing to last a paltry five and a half years, The Smiths imploded with guitarist Johnny Marr exiting the band due to exhaustion. Displaying a greater ability to overcome adversity, we carried on following former salesman Danny’s exit with a dogged determination of which Morrissey could only dream.
Jane Seymour, Anne of Cleves and Catherine Howard
The third, fourth and fifth wives of Henry VIII combined reigns may receive more coverage in history books, but even working together their tenure can’t match Banc Media’s six year stretch. From Jane Seymour marrying the big ol’ Tudor on 30 May 1536 to Catherine Howard having her head lobbed off at the age of 19 in 1542, Henry VIII married and outlasted three wives in less than six years. Not even Banc Media’s bowling nights can match the drama of Henry VIII’s mad sex life.
Kerry Katona and Brian McFadden’s Marriage
The modern day’s Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton; the marriage between the former Iceland mum-of-the-year and the noted homophobe was tragically short-lived. Their whirlwind romance produced two daft-named children before being cut short after four years and 11 months (including a two year separation period). Katona has since married a series of taxi drivers and steroid addicts. Although none of these can match the magic of the lasting friendship between Banc Media’s Martin Cozens and Neil Birchall.
Microsoft Live Search
Just one of Microsoft’s attempts to rival Google in the search engine world; Live Search was discontinued in 2009, just three years after the initial design. Microsoft Live Search was a continuation of MSN Search, which offered results from Looksmart and AltaVista to help users who couldn’t be bothered to use the address bar to arrive at Google and continue their search through the internet. Microsoft Live Search was abandoned to make way for Bing, Brian Badonde’s favourite search engine.
The cult TV showed chronicled the innovation and dogged determination of Walter White and his young drug buddy Jesse – but these qualities couldn’t help them match Banc Media’s longevity, lasting just five years and eight months. Additionally, Banc Media have not followed the story arc of Breaking Bad’s Walter White as he progressed from the great unlikely hero to vilified antagonist – we’re still the good guys.
Wesley Snipes’ Incarceration
The man who played Blade in Blade, Wesley Snipes celebrated his film success by avoiding paying tax at every given opportunity and filing fake claims for tax refunds. At the back end of 2010, when Banc was still in its infancy, Snipes began his three year stint in prison for trying to rob more than $10m from the US Government – cheekily entering a plea for release after just five months. Snipes’ mate, co-conspirator and anti-tax protestor Eddie Ray Kahn is still currently banged up with a planned release in 2026, just in time to celebrate Banc Media’s 17th birthday.
So whether you’re looking for an agency to help with SEO and PPC campaigns, or just want to wish us happy birthday – give Banc Media a call now on 0845 459 0558.